Icy Cold City
by NariNari
Summary: He said 'it's the stone cold world.'" Raito has come to a painful realisation. Lightest slash ever. RaitoxL.


**A/N**: I don't own Death Note or "Icy Cold City" by 12012.

**MATA!!!:** I don't normally just write songfics for fandoms but this was just a good one. Anyway, mentions of slash; RaitoXL.

**Icy Cold City**

_I took care of people with broken wings_

_The middle of town._

_I ruined it, it was only a matter of fear for existence._

My intentions were never to hurt those who did not deserve it, but only those who had asked for it or had gotten in my way. I never killed an innocent that had done nothing to stop me. I didn't kill those who said I was a monster, but still did nothing to stop me. I only took the lives of people who took the lives of others.

And people say that I, Kira, am no better than a murderer.

Those people are sorely mistaken.

I am doing my critics a favour, I am cleaning up the world, undesirable by undesirable. I am helping these people, taking care of those who can't take care of themselves by getting rid of the people who seek to hurt them.

I am not a monster.

_In screams, I continued to the end of agony_

_The middle of town, awareness that there is no orders_

_I'd rather be smiling_

I am not a monster.

I feel pain just as those who do not kill. I feel pain for killing. There are no forces here to take care of things that threaten society. Three years in prison does not constitute for putting some one in a coma. Reformation does not occur inside of cold grey walls. Reformation does not occur at all. You are who you are and you cannot change that.

Here, people feel the threat of the unknown, of the uncertainty. I have to take away that uncertainty. I am not a monster; I do not want to punish others. I wish I didn't have to.

**But I have to.**

_[Drain] [Bloom] [Squirm] in this follower to domineer_

_In the past I cried to smile_

_In the mundane middle opportunities_

_Come to the end of sanity, I wait for you_

And one day I met you.

You who were so pale and awkward, your eyes burning into my back. I knew who you were from the start. The coincidence too great, I knew what you were after.

And yet, I fell for you anyway. I often wondered to myself what I was thinking, and then I remembered your face and thought 'How could I not think it?' I had never met anyone like you.

We were opposites, you and I, and the same all at once. I had no real happiness in the world and neither did you. There was time when I was the follower and you the leader, when I could remember nothing of the task set before me to complete. In those days I was grateful for every chance I got with you.

But that couldn't last; we were too different in our missions. And despite that I asked you anyway.

_Naichainai_

Won't you take my hand?

_The answer_

_Projecting in the middle of the future_

_I guess I lost the obsession_

There was a time after that where you were my world. I knew the final answer, the final outcome. Maybe I was just preparing myself? I had to have you, I had to have you more than anything.

_He said "it's the stone cold world."_

You were suspicious then, my work slowing as I increasingly spent more and more time with you. You recognised the panicked glint in my eye, I think you knew the outcome too. And that was probably the frantic glint I saw in yours.

We didn't have much time, we both knew, but never spoke of it. I think we both blamed the world we lived in and thought with a sigh, 'If only, if only...'

_A broken wing, a feather_

_Dream watching birds hide their breaths._

_Continue looking up to the sky, smiling_

We were able to continue on like this for awhile, though, looking back now I wish we had had more time. Time to just be together, rather than having to play cat and mouse for the others. We were rarely alone, someone was always bothering you or my 'partner' needed something.

They didn't understand.

But we went on. A little blissful time where we pretended to be other people, I was not Kira and you were not The World's Greatest Detective. We were, Raito and Lawliet, two college students or shop workers or athletes or whatever else we wanted to be for that little moment in time. We were able to bind our dream to ourselves and hold on so tightly. I still can see the way you'd smile at me on those rare days when you'd venture outside, the warmth of the sun reflecting in your eyes.

But the puppet strings were growing thin, the act was almost over.

_Too mean to break_

_To endure the end (too mean to break)_

_All of me (too mean to break)_

_Looking foolish and delicious, taste your lips_

I had a brief period of stupidity, wherein I let on my true identity. Your eyes had turned to me, wide as the saucers you used for cake. I myself had been shocked at my admission.

And that was when I decided.

I had to act quickly, before you could. But you were right behind me.

We stood together, gripping Death in shared palms. I could feel the hate radiating behind me from the one coming to take you away. You knew what was to happen next, you knew I wouldn't, couldn't back down, not when I had come this far.

You lowered your hand, and quietly looked to the ground. The expression on your face brought tears to my eyes, your defeat was satisfying in a way, but your acceptance of it agonised me.

I cradled your head in my hand and kissed you passionately. You responded with equal fervour, and I ignored the unearthly sounds of protest behind me. I felt your tears on my cheeks, but only pressed my lips harder to yours. We parted, gasping.

Your eyes.

Your eyes will be the death of me.

_Bloom in the past._

_And future I must encounter reality_

_Come to the end of sanity_

_Describe the sail_

Your hands strayed to my face, your damned eyes searching mine for answer I couldn't give.

It was over now, it had to be over now!

What was I to do? What would you have me do? I have a duty to uphold!

You continued to stare at me with such sanguinity I let my own tears fall. We stood there, our tears silently falling between us, only clutching ourselves. Death lay forgotten at our feet.

_Naichainai_

I watched helplessly as they took you away. Your eyes were so cold, looking only at me. I knew if I touched that pale cheek I'd be met with the same icy cold.

_The heart_

_Floating to the sea of future_

I've more than once wondered if I did the right thing. The people I let down, the loss of a hero.

How will they go on? I know they have others, but I've taken away the best. What will they think of their hero now? Once unknown, revealed to be just a kid.

But, my heart is as content as it could be under the circumstances. One day, I'll see you again, and until then, I have my dreams and memories.

_I guess I will live tomorrow_

I once asked you, during a visit, how you could even stand to look at me after all this. You told me it was because you loved me, but all the love in the world could not get in the way of justice.

I supposed you were right and told you so.

It was then the guard came in and announced visiting hours were over. You nodded and stood, but I grabbed your hand.

I said to you that I wished we lived in a world where something like this would have never happened. Where I or you wouldn't have been needed. A world which crime and delinquency didn't exist. A world where we could have just been together, without the separation of these hard grey walls, and bullet proof glass.

I thought I knew what you were going to say, I thought you'd tell me it was only fair, that we had made or own choices, and I know you were right about that too.

But, instead you only smiled sadly and _you said 'It's the stone cold world.'_

**A/N:** This is my second Death Note fic, and also my second songfic for the fandom. Hah. My next work for this is also a songfic...I'm not sure why. Review if you like.


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